One of my many personal quirks has nothing do to with F&B service; it actually concerns the check.  When I pay $100.00 or more for an excellent dinner in  a world class restaurant, I really dislike seeing a separate charge of $1.50 for a cup of coffee.  This is purely personal, and I never allowed it to influence my official rating of a restaurant. 
 

A more serious service flaw is interruption by the server.  Sometimes it seems the server patiently waits until we are engaged in conversation to ask if we are enjoying the meal or to refill our water glasses.  While I know this is not intentional, the affect is

Ask Harry and Cheryl We encourage readers to email us with questions on ratings, guest services, design, decor, etc. We'll directly respond to your questions. Email Harry and Cheryl

annoying and can significantly detract from the meal experience.

I suggest that careful observation would enable the server to choose a more opportune time to approach the table.  I have many pleasant memories of attentive yet unobtrusive service.  My most memorable and also most expensive dinner experience was close to perfection.  We had total attention throughout the meal with no sense of interruption or intrusion.   The table was kept tidy at all times, courses were excellently spaced, beverage refill was perfect. We never had to ask for anything, but nothing was lacking. 

Equally remarkable, we had no sense of the server�s presence.  It was if things appeared and were removed by magic.  That experience convinces me that my expectations are not unrealistic.  The server was also able to create the illusion  that the meal for two was really worth almost $300.00.

Another F&B service flaw occurs when I pay cash for the meal and the server asks if I want change.  I think this is an unprofessional and inappropriate question.  The server should return the correct change and let the guest  deal with the gratuity as he or she chooses. 

While I do not suggest that any of these examples can ruin a dining experience, I know they can lessen the enjoyment.  I also know these service flaws can be reduced with a little effort on the part of management, and more attention to the details of fine service.   Short and focused training sessions can have very positive results..  Line-up is an excellent time to address these points with wait staff.

• Former head of AAA Lodging/Dining Ratings Program. 
• An independent consultant serving the hospitality industry. 
• A Special Training Consultant to the Educational Institute, American Hotel/Motel Association